As a personal and professional coach with clients in New Zealand, Australia, North America and (frankly) all over the world, I help people overcome hurdles and reach their potential. And, while many factors come into play when determining the cause of a person’s obstacles and hurdles, the biggest common factor that drives all of life’s problems is a lack of confidence. A lack of confidence can keep people from realizing that they deserve their dreams; it clouds our judgment, making it difficult for us to create a plan to achieve these dreams.
It’s time to stop the madness and start building the confidence that helps you to accept obstacles as healthy challenges – challenges that you’ll always be ready to meet, and beat. Here’s how to build your confidence to find more success in your professional and personal life.
1. Face it, you’re one of a kind – One of the first steps you can take toward building your self confidence is realizing (and accepting) that you are one of a kind. Your complete package – everything that makes you you – isn’t duplicated anywhere else in the world. What that means is that you have something to offer that no one else can. Once you accept your uniqueness, you’ll have an easier time understanding what your unique selling point is, which can help build your confidence.
2. Determine your purpose – This one’s a doozy, but worth the effort on your part. Why are you here, on this planet? Sure, you can get into spiritual and philosophical discussions which – while productive – can make your head spin. Rather, determine what you believe you’re destined to do. This doesn’t mean a career, necessarily, but it can include your work. Perhaps it’s being a parent, or charitable, or a successful business owner, or all of the above. Write down your beliefs of what your destiny is, so that you can better connect with your life’s purpose and remain on track.
3. Don’t take on others’ problems – By now in your life you’ve realized that you have your own fair share of problems to overcome. Why, then, should you take on the problems of others? You shouldn’t. It’s difficult to gain confidence in yourself if you have the weight of your problems – and the problems of others – pushing you down. Learn to let go and let live. This doesn’t mean not being compassionate. It just means realizing that you have to take care of yourself, and your own sanity, before anyone else can benefit from your strong sense of self.
4. Be present – A lack of confidence can often come as a result of being overwhelmed with a growing to-do list and a series of what-if scenarios. This type of behavior is detrimental to both your present self and future. How and why can you possibly worry about things that might or might not happen (the what-ifs), and how can you expect to focus your mind on 10 different tasks at hand? The notion of multitasking is a bit unfair. No one can be their best doing two tasks at once. Rather than take on the problems of the unknown, and assume too much at once, learn how to be mindful and present. Being present allows you to remain stable and responsive in your immediate environment, which will help build your confidence.
5. Build a social circle – It’s difficult to build your confidence if you have no one who can help you feel sure about yourself. Building a social circle as an adult is extremely different from social circles as a child. As an adult, you have more of a choice of who you associate with. Rather than befriend people because of circumstance or convenience, make a conscious effort to build a social circle of people who support you and who share your outlook on life. Your confidence can only go so far if you’re building it on your own. You need support along the way.
The difference between the so-called haves and have-nots has little to do with social stature and economic windfalls, and far more to do with confidence. The most successful people on this planet got that way because they believed in themselves and their abilities. By building your own confidence, you too can enjoy life from an entirely new outlook. However, not everyone can successfully build their confidence on their own. As part of your social circle you might want to consider the support of a professional or personal coach. Coaches help to guide you toward your goals and dreams, and provide you the tools necessary to fulfill your potential. Contact Edmond Otis today to learn more about his distance/virtual coaching sessions.
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